Florida Gators — that reminds me of a few old jokes

With Georgia having the week off, I decided to take things easy with this week’s column and run some old favorite jokes about the Gators as we head toward the annual border war this weekend.

Why did Florida choose orange as its team color? You can wear it to the game on Saturday, hunting on

Sunday and picking up trash along the highway the rest of the week.

How many Gators does it take to fix a flat tire? “Just one … unless it’s a blowout, then they all show up.”

What do you get when you cross a Gator with a groundhog? Six more weeks of bad football.

What’s the best thing to come out of Gainesville? Interstate 75.

What’s the difference between a Gator and a carp? One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker … and the other is a fish.

Did you know Adam was a Gator? He had to be because he was eating an apple while sitting next to a naked lady.

What did the Gator grad marry the cow? He had to.

What is 100 yards long and has three teeth? The front row at a Gator home game.

Why did Forrest Gump choose ’Bama over UF? He wanted an academic challenge.

What is the difference between Urban Myer and a litter of puppies? Eventually, the puppies will grow up and stop whining.

What do you call 12 Gators in a basement? A whine cellar.

Why don’t Gators call 911 in an emergency? They can’t find 11 on the dial.

What is the difference between a Gator and a dollar bill? You only get three quarters out of a Gator.

Why couldn’t UF have a Nativity scene this past Christmas? They couldn’t find three wise men.

Eric, the wheelbarrow bet is on. Better wear comfortable shoes 'cause I’m taking the Dawgs by 4.

It’s great to be a Bull Dawg. Go Dawgs. Sic 'em. Woof. Woof. Woof.